When to Leave a Relationship and Move on E22
With 15 years of experience in the public sector, Lala offers a unique, humorous, and relatable perspective. She encourages us to do the work before diving into the dating pool and offers tips on ensuring we’re in the best possible position for finding love.
Whether you’re just starting out or looking for advice on getting back out there, Lala’s got you!
When the Infatuation Fades: Beyond the Butterflies
Starting a new relationship can be incredibly exciting. You may find yourself texting and video calling each other constantly, and when you’re together, the chemistry is electric.
But over time, things can start to feel different. The butterflies may not be fluttering as much, and the rainbows might have faded away. Your partner might seem distant or like they’ve changed from who they were when you first met them. It’s normal to wonder if things will ever go back to how they were or if it’s time to move on from this relationship. You know deep down what the right decision is for you – but sometimes it’s hard to make that call.
Red flags such as feeling unhappy, your needs not being met, having no fun anymore, trust issues, lying, or cheating are all signs that it may be time to end things.
If your partner is exhibiting traits of abusive behaviour – such as becoming jealous about you spending time with family members, making negative comments about how you dress or your close friends, or getting angry when things don’t go their way and taking it out on you – then this should not be ignored either.
Abuse often worsens over time and can become extremely dangerous. Leaving an abusive relationship isn’t easy, but seeking help from trusted friends and family members who can support you through this difficult time could make all the difference in helping you retake control of your life – whether that means seeking counselling services or finding a shelter for victims of domestic violence.
Remember, no one deserves abuse in any form – not from their partner, family members, friends, co-workers or bosses – anyone. Have the courage to know that leaving an abusive situation is ultimately worth it for your safety and wellbeing in the long run.
LalalaLetMeExplain’s Sunday Times bestseller, ‘Block, Delete, Move On: It’s not you, it’s them’ can be your guide if you feel you’re always getting attached to people who don’t treat you the way you deserve.
The book will teach you how to spot the warning signs in modern dating and empower you to walk away if necessary. From ghosting and negging to gaslighting and abuse. It’ll help you recognise the red flags of a toxic relationship and the green flags of a healthy one.
Rather than promising to find someone for you, LalalaLetMeExplain will help ensure that your love life isn’t filled with people who secretly hate women or want sex without commitment. It’ll remind you that single life can be contented too – and that your own spectacular buff ting energy is worth protecting!
Are you looking for ways to improve your relationship and make it both healthy and communicative? In this article, we will provide you with tips on how to do just that.
Dating after a serious relationship or marriage can feel like a daunting task. After all, you’ve been with the same person for so long that it feels like you’ve forgotten how to date. It doesn’t have to be as scary as it seems. Here are some tips and strategies to help you navigate the dating world after a serious relationship or marriage:
Take your time
Don’t rush into anything. Give yourself time to heal and process the end of your previous relationship before jumping into something new.
Be honest with yourself
It’s important to take stock of why your last relationship ended and what you want from future relationships. This will help you ensure that you don’t repeat the same mistakes and that any future relationships are healthier.
Keep your options open
Don’t take things too seriously – remember that it’s okay if things don’t work out because there will always be someone else who is right for you down the line.
It’s easy to get discouraged when dating after a serious relationship or marriage, but try not to let negative thoughts creep in – stay positive and remember that things will eventually work out if they’re meant to.
LalalaLetMeExplain recommends understanding our attachment styles before dating. Recognise our red flags and heal from past trauma; otherwise, we may end up in messy and complicated relationships. If we date from a place of low self-worth or desperation for love, we can find ourselves repeating patterns and choosing the wrong people.
To avoid this situation, it is recommended to seek therapy if possible. Additionally, writing a list of previous dates and relationships to identify any patterns can be beneficial. Ultimately, self-love and loving being single are key components for successful dating experiences.
Helpful resources for those affected by this week’s episode of Women Who Rebrand:
Black Minds Matter UK is a fully registered charity operating in the UK. BMMUK connect Black individuals and families with free mental health services- by professional Black therapists to support their mental health. Our vision is to make mental health topics more relevant and accessible for all Black people in the UK., removing the stigma and remodelling the services pertinent to the Black community.
Talking therapies, or psychological therapies, are effective and confidential treatments delivered by fully trained and accredited NHS practitioners. They can help with common mental health problems like stress, anxiety and depression. You can access talking therapies for free on the NHS.
FIND OUT MORE
LalalaLetMeExplain is a Dating Educator, Sunday Times Bestselling Author, and Agony Aunt for OK Magazine.
Listen to LalalaLetMeExplain’s podcast for honest and raw advice on modern dating, sex, and relationships while you evaluate your options. Hear real people’s dilemmas discussed by guests on the show, but please note that it is intended for those over 18 as it contains adult content.
If you want to read LalalaLetMeExplain’s book, Block, Delete, Move On: It’s not you, it’s them, you can purchase it on Amazon and read her column at ok.co.uk. Additionally, follow LalalLetMeExplain on Instagram for dating tips and advice.
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